Thai's The Limit
By The Cave Dweller
From Issue 53, Autumn 2001
Bangkok - the original Sin City. You need the
patience of a saint even just to visit, one previous
visitors obviously being singer/songwriter Joe
Jackson. In fact, I can verify that 'Is she really
going out him?' was written here. It's a sick
place.
When you first see some 60-year old shuffle-arse
walking hand-in-hand with a Thai teenager it really
does hit the back of your throat! And no one can
swagger quite like an old cunt who's boning a
teenager. Now, the entire human race and Alex
Ferguson knows that the girl is only there for
the wallet, but deluded, coffin-dodging, Mr. Sad
Arse thinks he still has the glint of Clint Eastwood
in his eye, in spite of being about 100 kilo's,
bald and sweating like a pig on a spit. Never
underestimate the strength of self-delusion.
And of course there is worse. The paedophiles
you cannot even have the pleasure of laughing
at, as they slide slug-like through the gutters
not daring to catch anyone's eye and drawing them
from their cocoon of delusion. Why is scum like
this allowed out to terrorise people whose only
crime is poverty? Perhaps not surprisingly, it
is so often the middle and upper classes who indulge
in this part of the world. These are the people
who are representing the British (and other) Government
and our trade interests! To rub salt into the
wounds, it is common knowledge who the offenders
are and NOTHING IS DONE!
It was through this den of inequity that TTW&R's
(erm) "Foreign Correspondent" found
himself zigzagging between cars through the heavy
traffic in a vague attempt to trace a ticket for
the Liverpool - Thailand game at the Rajamangala
stadium on July 19th. Take one of these motorbike
taxi's and you are gambling with your life! In
my usual stubborn way I noticed a MU sticker on
the first taxi that came and gave him the choice,
remove the offensive item or he would not get
my fare. The next taxi took a while to arrive…………
Several smashed knee-caps later and I eventually
found the school where a mate (cheers Steve, cheers
Shawn) had left the ticket, but the girl in the
know was out at a meeting. The envelope with my
name on was found after much explaining and I
was on my to the stadium.
The Rajamangala stadium sits a way out of town
and once you get through the concrete is quite
impressive, leastways when its full of 60,000+
Liverpool fans making a mural of red around the
stadium. The press was beaming for a good week
before with one particular article proudly claiming
Liverpool as Thailand's team! "When Liverpool
win Thailand feels the joy as a point of national
pride, it is as if our team has emerged victorious".
This would all no doubt change when the Devil's
Own arrived in the next few days, and sure enough
it did - with their sources claiming they had
46% of the total Thai support, compared to 30%
for us. I read an article once comparing them
to the Nazi's, a bit harsh I know, surely Hitler's
boy's were never that bad! (Red, White and Black
I notice!) - rewriting the facts and history to
suit themselves! In actual fact Thai's are not
so partisan many of them would try to go to both
matches, tickets pending (more of that later)
Speaking with the fans was also fun: a guy in
an Everton shirt (a real rarity in these parts)
who told me "It's still Merseyside!"
- a good attitude. Face paint was popular in the
crowd (the Thai flag on one cheek and the Liver
bird on the other - no, Kelly! On their faces!!)
Some girls nearby chatted and when I explained
where I was born they said "Oh so you're
a Scouser! Scousers are cool!" The pre match
handshakes etc was highlighted by the Liverpool
squad turning to all sides of the stadium and
giving a "Wai." This is the traditional/respectful
greeting amongst Thai's and Lao - hands joined
in front of the chest and the head is bowed slightly.
Top marks at the club to whoever had the insight
to find that one out - the roar from the crowd
was special and appreciative. The Mancs failed
to get it, but they did present the Thai Prime
Minister Thaksin with a named and numbered shirt
though. Strangely fitting that he is soon up on
corruption charges and may be kicked out of office
if found guilty - concealing assets in his declaration,
no less. He 'forgot', apparently. (Update: since
I wrote this the PM has been cleared, with one
so adroit at dodging justice, his seat on the
MU board now is surely guaranteed!)
The game itself was not much of a spectacle -
a 3-1 win (Owen 2, Barmby), their goal being the
pick of the bunch (likewise as they lost to the
Mancs 2 - 1, their goal had a guy turn THREE defenders
in one move and place a perfect shot!). There
was the usual plethora of substitutions with Captain
Bellcheddar erm Redknapp making an appearance,
still resplendent with those trademark three yard
passes backward, you can see why Hou was reluctant
to splash the cash this summer. To quote Brick
Top - "He's a useless shite that boy!"
Riise looks good, with a killer throw on him.
But overall there is still a lack of class, especially
wide. Makes Houllier's decision to leave the Transfer
Market with a near empty trolley all the more
surprising. Still these fans deserved the day
out and the highlight was the chants of "Liverpool
/ Thailand" in Celtic/Rangers mode!
So what is behind this clamour to get into Asia?
Now there is obviously a passion for the game
on the fans part, they are knowledgeable and they
love it madly. It was reported that Liverpool
FC were about to make 8 million out of the two
games in Thailand and Singapore. A rumour that
the club was very quick to deny. Thai's are known
for being an extremely consumerist (gullible)
society so they are ripe for exploitation. The
modus operandi of the Mancs has always been "When
I throw a dog a bone I don't expect to be told
if it taste good or not". Borne out by the
fact that in a stadium that holds over 60,000
only 4,000 tickets went on sale to the general
public. The remainder went to 'Corporate Clients'
so that shady business deals may become easier.
At the same time there was blanket advertising
of their game (but of course they are not threatened
by us), a game for which they were denying their
true fans the possibility of purchasing a ticket,
all to sell their increasingly cheesy merchandising
to an ever increasing market. What do their lemming-like
fans do? Spend every last Baht on merchandising!
Dogs and bones is right - Brick Top really ought
to cut Edwards' 'Jacobs' off.
Liverpool had over 20,000 tickets on general sale
but nevertheless it is an interesting dilemma
they are faced with. Do they become a MU style
self-publicising machine or can they compete and
retain a little of the dignity they have not yet
sold? MU prove it works, after all, lemming fans
the world over all buying into the lie with hard
earned cash. Would the fans be happy with the
Mancs rewriting history alone and LFC unable to
afford to compete on (and off) the pitch?
The fans here certainly deserve better than being
treated as a wallet extension. I have travelled
the world, being from Liverpool has always stood
me in good stead (in everything except the job
market) largely because of the good reputation
of the club. I've had free beers, free meals etc
(no free sex though!) always at the hand of some
kindly folk who remember and wish to reminisce
about more than one glorious moment from a magical,
unrivaled past. Our fans the world over deserve
better because they represent the real sporting
fan as opposed to the glory hunting sheep who
support the devil's own.
On July 19th, a young Thai man named Sakchai Sithichai
leapt from his building and plunged to his death,
distraught at the fact that he had been unable
to 'afford' a ticket for the game (they seemed
reasonably priced to me, about 3 quid) and would
not get to see his beloved Liverpool team. He
left a young wife and child behind. We MUST NOT
follow the Mancs lead, surely both the fans and
the club know better than anyone that one death
over a game of football is too high a price?
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